Mayhem

I feel like our lives have been complete mayhem for the  past five months.  After spending most of our time in Mississauga deciding if we should stay in Ontario or head back to Alberta as originally planned, we decided that we would stay. This decision broke my heart because of all the things that we would be saying goodbye to.  We were just supposed to be on a year long adventure in Ontario, NOT STAY! It came down to the fact that Ontario is the place that Matthew needs to be for his business.  Things have gone very well here for him because he is here full time and not flying back and forth.  We have definitely seen him more since we came here with him and  with all our prayers, having him around was the strongest answer to the question of whether we should stay in Ontario.

 Once we finally made the decision to stay we had a another painful decision of where to live.  We really liked it in Mississauga but we did not like our landlord and we knew we had to move.  We tried finding another rental but nothing worked out and so we looked into buying.  I was appalled to find out what the cost of housing was in Mississauga.  We realized that for the size of house we needed to fit our family we would have to pay 6-700,00 dollars for something we didn't really like, needed renos and had no back  yard.  We were frustrated because we wanted to stay in Mississauga. We loved our ward at church, the kids had made some great friends and Matthew was close to the head office of his businesses main client.  I was online for hours looking for options and I had four realtors sending me properties to rent and buy in the area.

I have a cousin that lives out in Cambridge and  I decided to look out there.  Everyone we talked too said that it was so far out  of the GTA and that it would be a long commute for Matthew that he would hate, but when I looked at the price for housing I got excited.  We could buy a lot more for our money and it was near family - something that I was desperately missing.  It took a lot of convincing to get Matthew to agree to even look. I felt like I was being very selfish pushing to move out there.  Matthew didn't want to leave the ward or commute ( neither did I), the kids did not want to leave their friends and we would be starting all over again. But I felt like we needed to find a place that we could comfortably afford and that is what finally convinced Matthew too.

Since making that decision it has been constant work getting it done.  I feel like I have moved 10 times when in reality it has only been three times in the last 3 months.  We had to get our house in Edmonton ready to sell so  we hired our contractor that has helped us before and a friend who is a painter and got the house ready to sell.  I felt bad for our renters who were going through many challenges of their own: preparing to move to Mississippi, three little children and another on the way, and a father who was re diagnosed with Hodgkins. They were great though, very willing to help through the reno and showings of the house.

We put the Edmonton house on the market on the beginning of June and had a couple of offers but nothing that came together.  Then when July hit the viewings dropped dramatically and we became a  bit worried.  We really needed to sell so that we could then buy before the end of the summer or we would not have any where to live when we came back to Ontario after packing up in Edmonton.  We decided to get out of the rental we were in because our lease was coming due and we did not want to continue with the landlord for any more time and we planned to go back to Alberta for most of July and August to pack our house and see our family and friends.

While we waited for our house in Edmonton to sell we packed up all of the things we had accumulated over the last year in Mississauga and put it in storage.    I stayed to finish up the move in Mississauga with the older two children so that they could finish their camps and football season and Matthew took the younger three and drove across the US.  It took them four days and they drove straight to Calgary and picked us up at the airport.  They looked very tired of the car.  But our journey was not over.  We drove another 8 hours to Vernon where we stayed a week with Matthews father and stepmother at their cabin on the Okanagan.  We had beautiful weather and a wonderful time  together.  It would be our only vacation time over the summer because we then headed straight back to Edmonton where I drove Matthew to the airport to go back to Toronto for work and I started packing.  Thankfully the house sold the first week of August, at a lower price then we wanted but we weren't too disappointed, we knew we had gotten what it was worth.

While Matthew looked for a house in Ontario in his spare time I  tried to purge as much of our belongings as I could.  We wanted to spend as little as possible on moving and we decided to get rid of all our furniture except our dining room table - I couldn't part with it, it was our first piece of furniture I really liked.  I had garage sales over two weekends and I felt exhausted after the first day.  Most of the stuff I was selling I still liked and wanted but couldn't justify bringing it with us. I didn't even have time to price the items before people were showing up trying to get everything for free.  Some things I know I gave away and others I couldn't believe that I got what I was asking for.  It was all a very hard experience for me letting my memories go to someone else.  But I kept the most important things and I know I will make new memories in our new home.

We enjoyed very much seeing our friends and family.  There were so many people that we missed seeing.  Doing this move over the few short weeks of summer made it so that many people were away when we were in Alberta so it wasn't the reunion we had hoped it could be, but we were glad to see a lot of our loved ones before we moved away.

 As I was packing  the items that we weren't selling and getting ready for the moving company, we still did not know where we were going to live when we got back to Ontario.  Ironically the market had picked up in Cambridge and any of the houses that we had looked at before our house sold were selling quickly and we were running out of choices.  We put an offer on one house that I had never seen and we were turned down.  It turned out it was owned by two men who were not speaking to each other and couldn't agree on what the house should sell for.  We made attempts at offers to them and in the end they took the house off the market.

The house we did get was a "fixer upper" that we had looked at before going to Alberta but because there was a lot of other choices at the time we weren't very interested in this one.  I really did not want to have to deal with a lot of renovations.  Well guess what, there are a lot of renovations needed. We decided that it was the right size and right location and right price and it has a lot of "potential".  In fact it will be the best house that we looked at once we have it fully renovated, so we are happy with our decision.

Matthew came back to Edmonton just in time for the moving company to load up.  Then we loaded our van with everything we forgot to put in the truck and we said goodbye to our house of five years and to Edmonton - the home of our hearts.

We were still finalizing the house deal on our drive across the country back to Ontario.  We found that there are very few places that offer print and faxing services between Saskatewan and Minneapolis.  We finally got the deal done and enjoyed a day of shopping and playing at The Mall of America.  It's cool but not as good as West Edmonton Mall.

Having just closed the deal on the house while driving across the country, we were not able to move in right away.  Thankfully my cousin Todd and his wife Paula let us crash with him and their family, which was pretty awesome because they live in a huge house on a lake with a pool and lots of fun things to do.  When we got possession of our new home I took the kids over and showed them the new house, they were not impressed.  I described the plans that we had for renovating it and Noah said "great, you guys stay here, I am living with Todd and Paula".  He really enjoyed their XBOX.

We moved in a week after school started.  We moved all of our Mississauga belongings from the storage unit and set them up but we knew we couldn't really settle in because we were going to be gutting the main floor in the next couple of weeks and would have to pack a lot of it up again.  We tried to be settled in as much as we could but there are a lot of piles everywhere.  We enjoyed two weeks of half settled life and then we went back into caos when our kitchen was torn down, the flooring on the main floor ripped out and dust was settling everywhere.  A huge blessing is that we have been led to some great trades people that have been honest, efficient, reliable and reasonably priced so that we could get through this ordeal.  We have gotten to know a small group of the Portugese community through the network of trades we have met.  The relationship they have with each other reminds me of the feeling of community we have as members of the church.  I have really been impressed with them.

 We have been living without a kitchen and flooring on the main floor for two weeks but we are now at the stage where they are putting everything back together. The flooring is going in this week and the kitchen cupboards come in next week.  I have a brother who with his wife, renovate whole houses on their own and lived in it for months if not years. I do not know how they could handle it.  I am going crazy to be organized again and have a place to cook other than a microwave and a toaster.

I know some day very soon we will be settled in this house and we will be able to do things with it that will make it feel like our home.  We are missing our life in Alberta very much, as well as our new friends in Mississauga.  But we have been very welcomed in our ward, schools and neighbourhood here and we know with time we will be at home.

Happily Ever After!

New house

Old house

Football

For my writing class we were asked to write a piece  about a place. I decided to write about being at my son's  first football game.

Football

It's a beautiful May, Saturday morning.  I walk onto the field with my twelve year old son Jack.  The turf is bright green with no blemishes except the fresh white lines that outline the playing field and large white numbers stamped every ten yards along the side lines.  Two bright yellow goal posts face each other in  either end zone like colossal pitch forks. Six mammoth light posts surround the stadium, with five bulbous pot lights staring down at the scene below,  giant eyes keeping watch like sentinels.

First impressions? Impressive.  These are real teams, on a real field with real uniforms.  I felt like I was standing on the field of Friday Night Lights, very American.  Not the Canadian apology version of the sport that I was used to, but the real deal. This is serious.  I think that makes my twelve year old son very nervous.  Its his first year playing so he didn't really know what to expect.  He thought it was a "just for fun" team, but he was wrong, we both were.

Black uniform bags line the sidelines, with water bottles and clipboards littering the ground where they have been dropped.  Players mill around in groups, stretching and warming up, waiting for the whistle to blow to start the game. These are boys of all ages, economic backgrounds, races and personalities but when they have the uniform on they are a team, they are one.

Up close and personal these boys seem to be vulgar, snot spitting, crotch scratching, motherless Neanderthals, but when the coach calls "huddle up" and the whistle blows, they become a well oiled machine. For most of the people here this is their life.  The coaches eat and breath football, coaching both high school teams as well as their son sons club ball.  The players themselves prepare for their dreams of being football stars, or maybe that is the dreams of their parents.  For myself and my son, we are just trying to figure out whether we have put the padding on in the right places and its
right side up.

The team is  Mississauga Warriors - red, white, and black.  They've had a number of championship victories and from what I have seen at practice they are going for another.  I'm excited for my son to be a part of this team and once he gets over his nervous jitters and gets into the game I can tell he is excited too.  It's a lot of time and commitment  but I love seeing the smile on his face when he comes off the field bruised and disheveled but victorious because he made a good tackle.  

Favorite Quote #2

Here is a quote I heard this month in reference to Mother's Day. I thought it was pretty good.


"Life didn't come with a manual, it came with Mother's."

-unknown

Happily Ever After!

Feeling Good at Forty.

My Prince Charming turned forty last week. Wow, when did he get so old.  The fact that he has reached this milestone age doesn't seem to phase him, for which I am glad, I do not need a forty year having one of those midlife crisis' before he is even  midlife yet.  Is forty midlife yet? I can never tell these days.
I'm freaking out a little bit. If he is forty then it is a few short years until I'm forty and I'm still trying to get used to being in my thirties. Half the time I can't remember if I am 37 or still 36 turning 37. Sometimes I have to think of what year it is before I remember yes, I am already 37 and I am turning 38. Hey, when did that happen?
I think that if I wasn't content with what I have accomplished in my life up to this point then I might be a bit more panicked about my age, but looking back I am happy with who I am and what I have done with my life.  There are a few things that I hoped I could have done better. If I am really silly and compare myself to someone else I could feel inadequate in how much wealth or material possessions I have acquired. I have learned that those things are not important or worth stressing over.  I have a beautiful family, a wonderful husband, a comfortable home and I know who I am, that is a recipe for happiness and contentment.
I am proud of my husband for all that he has accomplished in and out of our home.  I am grateful that his priorities are straight.  He works hard for his family and reaches for his dreams but he puts us first and makes us a part of his every day plans.  We have lots of fun and enjoy many great adventures together that help is grow better with age.  Beside, I love the traces of grey highlighting the edges of his hairline. Forty looks good.

Making dreams come true.

I just finished a workshop on how to get published.  This is the second workshop I have signed up for from Brian Henry. He is a writer, editor and creative writing teacher in the GTA that I discovered when I found his blog http://quick-brown-fox-canada.blogspot.ca/ while searching for a writing group to join. Another workshop of his that I am taking is a creative writing class that I take every Tuesday afternoon.   I am thoroughly enjoying all I am learning.

At the  workshop on how to get published that I went to on the weekend I had a lot of my questions answered about what to expect in the publishing world, whether or not I would need an agent to get my   work looked at and how to get an agents attention.  We also were able to meet an agent named Olga Filina who further answered our questions about what agents are looking for and their job description as to what an agent does to get a writers work published.  When the  workshop was over I felt very excited, with a renewed commitment to write, write, write and complete the writing I have started.  I am realistic enough to realize that what I am writing may not be of interest to anyone but myself but I am not daunted.  In fact, this weekend has helped re-energize my hopes and dreams and a belief in the "what if".  What if I do have something others are interested in. I won't know unless I try.

I am also really enjoying my creative writing class.  We meet in a charming old church in Burlington.  There are a number of us writers that get together to encourage each other and develop our writing. I enjoy having an audience that I can share my work with and who will respond back in critical yet encouraging ways.  It is comforting to have so many comrades  who understand the challenge of putting your thoughts and feelings out there to be judged.

After the first class two weeks ago, I went away with mixed feelings.  On the one had I enjoyed the writing exercises that we did - story starters from one line sentences.
 I enjoyed hearing everyones work, but I felt daunted because there are some really talented writers in my class and I was feeling like my work was garbage.  I know this is a common feeling when comparing ones work with another's and I know that I need to use that feeling to challenge myself  to keep writing. I believe in my words and I believe in myself.  I know I can make this dream come true.
Happily Ever After!

Favorite Quote #1

I've had this quote on my fridge for years and still love it every time I read it.

"I see these moms who can do everything and I think.....

I should have them do some stuff for me."

- Anonymous

Getting Rid of My "Mommy Tummy"

I found these great exercises for getting rid of my persistant "mommy tummy".  I have been doing a fairly rigorous workout for the past six months and I feel like I have toned up everywhere but the middle part of my abs.  Will this muffin top ever go away.
While searching through some blogs about exercise I found a web site with these great ab exercises for mom's.  I learned about a condition called Diastasis Recti.  This is where your ab muscles have not returned to there pre pregnancy state and there is a gap running down the middle of your abs.
 I have posted the link for the website that goes into detail about the condition and what to do for it on my blog.
While reading the article I found out that all that ab work I have been doing for the last six months could actually be causing more damage to my abs if I do have this Diastasis Recti.
 I decided to do the test.  I laid on the floor and lifted my legs up, leaving my feet flat on the floor.  Then I lifted my head like I was going to do a sit up and then felt along the center of my rib cage to my navel. I was shocked to find that there was a space there where I could push two fingers down in between my abs.  It was quite a freaky feeling.
I have never heard of Diastasis Recti before and I am excited to be doing the exercises. Not only because I want to get rid of this bulge on my waste line but I  have a lot of back pain and I am often being told that I need to strengthen my core.  I've been feeling frustrated because I have been working hard to work my abs but I am not having any success at reducing the back pain.  I started seeing a physio a couple of weeks ago and I told him about these ab exercises and Diastasis Recti. He had heard of it and also recommended a belt that I can use to bring my core closer together.  When I find out more about the belt I will post something.
The exercises are not very strenuous  I feel strained while doing these minor movements. I suppose that shows how week my core really is. I am hoping this is the answer to strengthening my core. I'll let you know how it is going.  I would recommend other mothers to do the test and try the exercises, it may prevent any future back pain and also help with the "mommy tummy".
Happily Ever After!

Another fun adventure - Palmyra this time.

April has already been a busy month here in Ontario.  I can't believe it is already half way through the month.  Mom and dad came to visit from Calgary.  We had been planning this visit since the fall and it was great to have them here.  They came the Sunday before General Conference and we had a great weekend listening to the messages from the leaders of the church, eating lots of yummy conference treats and attending Jack's ordination to the Priesthood.  I can't believe he is 12 and a deacon.  We also had my cousin Todd and his family over for dinner.  They live not far from us here in Ontario but this was the first time we have had them over. We really enjoy hanging out with them.

  On the Monday after Conference we drove 3 hours south to Palmyra NewYork.  What a beautiful, peaceful place.  Upon first impressions it seemed a lot like the small town of Nauvoo.  A lot of fascinating church history, but not a very big community around it.  As we found our way down to Palmyra's main street, a beautiful New England community unfolded with quaint little houses and farms , along with beautiful modern homes and well kept city streets.  On  Main street are four ornate  brick church's that stand as pillars representing the oppressive attitude surrounding the area at the time when the Smith family resided in Palmyra.


The first historic site we sought out was the Smith farm.  Upon arriving at the Welcome center we were greeting by two friendly and knowledgable couple missionaries who took us on a tour of the farm.

The first stop on our tour was the old log house. To think that 12 people occupied this tiny, wooden home is hard to imagine.  It makes me feel grateful for the comfortable home that I have and I realized that I have way more than I need. Standing in the upstairs loft that was used as a bedroom for all the children, I marvelled to think that the Angel Moroni appeared to Joseph in that room and began to teach him the beginnings of what he would need to know to prepare his young mind for the work that was ahead of him.  I'm sure that he could have begun to think that the vision of God and His son Jesus Christ was just a dream until Moroni appeared to him to confirm it.
It was fun to imagine being there with the Smith family. Looking out the window of the Smith house  and seeing the fields, the bare forest, the spit rail fences and the small creek tumbling by made me feel closer to that valiant family.

 We then progressed on to the next home the Smith's built on their land after a number of years of living in the log house.  This next house was designed by their eldest son Alvin who was a talented architect.  Unfortunately, Alvin died before the house was complete. I was saddened to learn that they lost the title to this house and had to move back to the log cabin. I hope that they didn't loose it due to disgruntled persons who didn't like what Joseph was preaching.

Alvin's Tree

This is believed to be the tree that the Smith family planted in memory of their beloved Alvin.

The Sacred Grove

My favorite part of the tour was The Sacred Grove.  Most of the pictures we have that depict the First Vision show the Grove alive with leaves and flowers and sunlight.  Our visit to the Grove was in the spring time. The same time of year that the First Vision occurred.  Although the buds were appearing on the branches and there were bundles of Daffodils spotting the path throughout the Grove,  there was not a lot in the way of life. Everything was pretty barren. I imagine that it was more like this scene when Joseph went to pray.  We felt the peace and the tranquility of the sacred place. Walking along the paths and believing that God the Father and his son Jesus Christ appeared to Joseph in that place made the event that I had been taught all my life more real.   I was grateful to be able to share that experience with my husband, children and parents.  The Grove is quite large and we  tried to see if there was one particular spot that felt more Holy so that we could pin point the exact spot that God and Jesus appeared, but our experience wasn't like that.  The whole place felt calm.  Like the rest of the world was quiet and far away and we could be  free from cares.  We were told there were 6 restoration trees still  standing in the forest.  We were told that Restoration Trees were trees that were old enough to have been standing when the First Vision happened. We found one that was cut down the day before and left to rot because it was decaying through the  base and they didn't want it to damage any other trees when it fell. 

Learning how to print a copy of the Book of Mormon.

E. B. Grandin Press.

The first 5,000 copies of the Book of Mormon were printed here.

Front room of the print shop.

One of the first 5,000 copies of the Book of Mormon and an old Bible from that same time period.

Going to the historic site for the first Book of Mormon printing press, helped us to understand the magnitude of the work that went into  printing those first 5,000 copies.  The sister missionaries demonstrated how the printers would have prepared the press and printed each page.  We then were able to assemble the first sixteen pages of the Book of Mormon  through folding and cutting a printed page.  What a task that must have been. I sure am  grateful for  our modern day printers.

The Hill Cumorah      

The last stop was the Visitors Center and The Hill Cumorah.
The boys and Alice loved running up and down the hill.  It was a great way of  getting them tired out for the long drive home.    I loved the Moroni monument for its depiction of the historical events that happened anciently and in these latter days.  To think that this was the place that Moroni first buried the gold plates and where Joseph found them and other sacred artifacts, made me feel as if Heaven was not far away. Its neat to look at the hill itself because it really is just a bump in the landscape with the fields all around. There are no other hills or protrusions around it.  There is just the hill. 

Our visit to Palmyra was very enjoyable and we have plans to go back soon. It is so fun to live close to so many choice historical sites.  We are enjoying our many adventures and we are glad we could share this one with my parents.  Thanks to mom for helping me navigate my way home.  We all know that I am not the greatest at navigating unfamiliar territory and following Matthew home in our van while he was in our car with my father was an adventure all on its own.  It didn't help that there were a lot of huge semi trucks and torrential down pour making the task fairly hazardous.  We did make it home safe and sound even if we did make a few wrong turns.

Happily Ever After !

There is such a thing as too much fun.

Happy Easter everyone.  We had a great Easter weekend.We have gotten to know some great families here in Ontario and it has now become a tradition to get together on these holidays because none of us have much  family close by.  It is great to have friends that start to feel like family.
we have had a very adventurous month of March.

We went to Kingston at the beginning of the month for a basketball tournament.

We won the gold.

Kingston is a really neat place with cool architecture, but the highlight for my kids was the swimming pool in the hotel.

 We went to Washington D.C. for March break.

Candy shop on King Street in Old Town Virginia.

White House

Air and Space Museum

Once again, great history, architecture and shopping.  But their favorite part was the hotel pool. Aargh!

Last weekend we took them to a Maple Syrup festival in Burlington Ontario.   

Enjoying syrupy treats.

Collecting sap.

250 year old Maple tree.

100 year old Maple Syrup process.

 This weekend we celebrated J's twelfth birthday by eating waffles and going to see Jack the Giant Slayer. 

Then we proceeded to spend each day of the long weekend doing many fun Easter events such as an Easter egg hunt and Easter dinner with friends.

So today was the first day we hadn't been thoroughly entertained for a number of weekends and I intentionally did not plan anything special to do outside of the house.  I believe my children should have time to be bored and not be entertained and running to activities all the time. I hope that because I had five children they will play together and not need me or M to entertain them constantly.  How quickly children forget.  All day all I heard was "I'm bored",  "can I watch tv", "I'm so bored I would rather be at school" (shocker), "I'm so bored - we never do anything".  That was when I put them to work.  We did lots of piano and violin practicing, multiplication practice and house work.  Soon they were glad to get away from me and hide so that they could happily "be bored" without bothering mom.

Happily Ever After everyone!

Six Happily Ever After Habits

So, I've decided to change my blog name back to it's original  - "Happily Every After...is a whole lot of work".  I feel that it better describes what my blog is about.  Although I still call myself Slackermom it doesn't quite suit what I am trying to share.  There have been  a number of times that I have met other moms  who I can tell are just trying to survive.  You can see in their eyes that they are overwhelmed with their responsibilities as a wife and a mother.  They are trying to keep up and measure up but feel like they are falling short with everything they are trying to do.  I have felt like this myself. I  recognize  that blank, glazed over stare of silent hysteria because that has been me so many times.  Over my sixteen years of marriage and mothering I have learned what is important for me to focus on so that I don't get overwhelmed trying to do everything.  I've learned my limits and recognize cues that warn me to step back and rethink so that I don't get into  situations that are not what I am about (my first cue is that I am hyperventilating). I'm not perfect at it, I am still learning, and some of those lessons I would like to share with you.
I stated in the  description of myself that I want to be a writer. Well, I've been working on a book.   They say to write about what you know, so I am going to try and share my thoughts and experiences on how I survive the process of living "Happily Ever After" by focusing on what I call "Six Happily Ever Habits".

Six Happily Ever Habits

(If anyone can come up with a better title I am open to ideas.)

1. Who do you want to be - figure it out. 
2. Do not expect perfection. 
3. Love your kids........but not too much.
4. Love your spouse first.
5. Allow for help.
6. Serve others.

I hope these are experiences that you can understand and relate to and that you will enjoy reading about.

Happily Ever After!

Humble Pie

So my last post was me letting off a little steam.  I'm hoping to not come off negative. I do want to be real and honest in my experiences. I hope through my sharing that others can empathize and maybe find answers to their own family life challenges or find that they are not alone in having many highs and lows in marriage and family life - and to be ok with them.   My experience with my neighbours kept nagging me all the next week.  I would find myself cringing just going outside my front door with fear that I might run into one of them.  I have had great relationships with my neighbours in the past and dislike the feeling of hiding behind my front door. So this past Sunday I had decided to bake some cookies for two women at church that I visit with every month.  I was just getting a batch out of the oven when a thought came to me that I should take some over to the neighbours house.  AAAhhhh!  I hate those good deed thoughts sometimes.  They are truly a pain in the neck.  I knew that I had not dealt with the situation with J and Hank perfectly. I had let my temper get away from me and although I felt justified in dealing with the situation, I could have dealt with it better.
Like a reluctant child being told to go say "sorry". I wrapped up some cookies, walked next door and rang the doorbell.  I wasn't sure what to expect.  I half prayed that they wouldn't be home......they were.  I quickly apologized for my behaviour the week before and asked them to forgive me for raising my voice in their home and dealing with the situation in anger.  They were great.  They invited me in and we had a great talk.  They explained their point of view  with apologies as well. Apparently she had been suffering from a head ache and didn't deal with the situation well either.  We were able to come to an understanding of each other not just in the situation with J but as next door neighbours as well.  We still have differences of opinion, but nothing we can't tolerate happily, and a great weight of negativity has been  lifted off of my shoulders. I'm glad I put away my pride.  Humbly standing up for myself is always better.

No More Mr. Nice Guy.

So we continue to have a fabulous time here in Ontario.  We just went away for the weekend to a basketball tournament for M in Kingston Ontario.  That is quite a neat place with very interesting architecture and history including the grave site of Sir John A. MacDonald, Fort Henry and the ominous Kingston Penitentiary - that place creeped me out.  M's team was very successful in their tournament taking home their third gold metal of the tournament season.
We have enjoyed getting to know people here in the GTA.  We have made some good friends and  have enjoyed the great diversity of people around us.  We are struggling though  to have any sense of a feeling of home.  I have tried to get to know my neighbours and just like any neighbourhood some people are easier to get to know than others. One set of neighbours that live right next to us have been challenging.   Through a number of interactions over the last six months they have shown that they think our children are  a nuisance - because they have built their snow forts in between our two drive ways -  and our dog is a pest.  I don't really know what they think of me or my husband because the wife has only ever said two words to me - until today - and the husband is sort of friendly in an awkward way that makes you wonder if he meant what he just said to you or did you miss understand his weird comment because his english is still a little broken.  Most of our interactions have been tolerable, especially because I know we will not be living next to them for very long.  Today I felt I needed to take a stand.  I had asked our 11 year old son J to take our dog Hank out to play in the cul-de-sac.  There is  a nice fenced in area there and our yard is not big enough to lay down in let alone play fetch.  Hank is still a puppy and gets very excited when other dogs come around.  Well our neighbours son came into the cul-de-sac with his dog and hank took off running towards him.  Like most puppies he was ready to play and he jumped on the dogs side and started nipping at the other dogs ear.   Well the seventeen year old  teenager asked Jack why he couldn't control his dog and became very concerned that Hank was going to cause his dog to bleed.  Well J got a hold of Hank's leash and they both came home with their tails between their legs.  J came in the door exclaiming that he was never taking Hank out to play again.  He was embarrassed and made to feel like he had done something wrong.  He told me what had happened and my mama bear instincts reared.  This had been one too many times that my children had been made to feel like they were doing something wrong by people bigger and older than them and I had had enough.  I have never liked it when an adult has ever yelled or reprimanded my children when they were not in an authority position to do so.  Especially when they haven't done anything wrong.  I don't believe in yelling at other peoples children, that is their mothers job.  I had already, kindly, expressed to this family that if they had any issues with us and our dog they should come and talk to me directly and not my children or my landlord -which they have already done one time.  I believe I am a reasonable person and I have already been trying to be a good neighbour. Not letting my dog  bark for very long, not putting him outside too early in the morning and bringing him in if he got too noisy, but they still felt they had reason to complain  - but not directly to me. I decided to go over and let the boy know that he had hurt J's feelings and to please be careful of how he talked to my son.  I don't like confrontation.  Especially because my temper flares fast and I get very emotional, but I felt like I needed to stand up for my son.  The neighbour boy was very polite to me as always but as I was explaining my concerns his parents showed up and started adding their complaints and letting me know how irresponsible a parent and a pet owner I was.  Needless to say I went from calm to loud and somewhat unChristlike.  They were so unreasonable, I went away spitting nails.  The part that made me even more mad was that I went away feeling like "I"had done something wrong. Boy, that was a mess.  I am glad though that I stuck up for my son and my family.  I know that we are not perfect.  In fact, we are very imperfect, but we are trying our best.  Sometimes with five kids and a dog we look very harry- carry and loud but I know that we are considerate and not intrusive.  I know I let my kids do things other parents might not. Like climb to the top of a jungle gym, or to the top of a tree - I've had negative comments from parents about that before.  But I hope that through these experiences I have learned to try to tolerate and let other people be who they are and try not to let them bully me into thinking my instincts are wrong.  I guess my goal to make friends with those neighbours is caput.  Take care all. We miss you.

Just Keep Trying.

Tonight I had a great conversation with my 11 year old son.  We had just finished reading the scriptures as a family before bed and we read a verse that said that if we just believe in Christ and follow Him  all will be well.  After I had gotten every one tucked in bed I went to say goodnight to Jack and he had a concerned look on his face.  I asked him what was wrong and he said that he felt frustrated because he was trying to do what was right and follow Christ but it was hard because he made so many mistakes. I was a little surprised by this comment because Jack is a really, really good kid and for him to be feeling unworthy made me want to set his mind at ease right away.  We talked about how believing and following Christ doesn't mean that we have to be perfect, He only asks us to be trying.  Heavenly Father knows we are going to make mistakes, that's why he sent his son to help us fix those mistakes.  We just have to keep trying.  That is what enduring to the end means.  Believing, having faith and then to keep trying.  We also talked about how Satan will try to bring us down.  That when we make a mistake he'll try to convince us that we are done and not worthy of Heavenly Fathers blessings anymore.  We are always worthy of His blessings and of Christ's atonement.  He will always be there to carry us, we just have to keep trying.  There are many times I have felt less than worthy to be a mom and I have struggled with all the things that I feel I should be doing.  I feel like there are so many things to be concerned about and I can't mess up because these are little people I am taking care of. I have to keep reminding myself that I don't have to be perfect, I just have to keep trying - and pray that when I do mess up Heavenly Father will pick up the slack where I fail.  After all they are his children first.  I also have to not listen to those insecurities telling me that I messed up again - it just wears me down and takes up too much energy. I am grateful that I have the knowledge that there is a Heavenly Father who loves us and is looking out for us.  And even though there are things that he expects of us.  He will always be there to love us and carry us through.

Best Kids Hotel Get Away So Far

Alice was not interested in being in this picture.

This past weekend we took our 5 kids to the Great Wolf Lodge in Niagara Falls.  We had heard of this place before and were hoping to make it part of our Christmas holidays but found that it worked better for us to wait and go when we thought  it would be less busy.  It's only an hour away from where we live and it is amazing.  They have so many activities going on for kids and adults that it was hard to fit it all in  with the time that we allowed ourselves.  The main lobby has animated wolves, moose and bears that talk to the kids and are very cute and lifelike. There is always a roaring fire in the front and it has a very rustic feel.  The room that we stayed in had plenty of room for all of us the a log cabin type club house taking up half the room with a bunk bed and a singel bed inside as well as their own tv.  The boys really enjoyed that.

Sorry - a little blurry.

The main attraction at the lodge is a giant waterpark. It is huge and very fun with lots of eye catching out door themed structure throughout the park. There was lots to do for all the kids and we enjoyed hours of playtime over the two days we were there.

 

 We found it very economical because we could check in early and then go to the waterpark one day and then stay over one night and spend as long as we wanted at the park the next day after check out.  We contemplated staying one more night but we had so much fun over that day and a half that we were ready to go by 5:00 and were home in time to eat supper at home.

  The only complaint that the kids had was that the hot tube was't very hot.  We are finding that hot tubs are a rarity in Ontario pools and it makes swimming kind of a bummer.  They had adult only hot tubs at the hotel and Matthew and I would try to sneak away every so often so that we could warm up.  Other fun features of the hotel were a huge arcade where Matthew and Maggie earned many tickets playing the basketball game over and over and over again.   They also had a really good buffet with different foods that we all enjoyed. The kids favorite was the jello and the mussels.  My kids like shell fish.  I keep wondering if that is weird.    While Matthew and I enjoyed many platefuls at the buffet the kids went out to the front lobby and listened to story time with a group of other children from the hotel.  It was very neat with some of the animated animals telling some of the stories.  They also had a neat magic adventure quest that the kids could do throughout the hotel.  You buy wands at the gift shop and get them activated so that you could go throughout the hotel on a quest. The are screens with characters that give clues and the kids use their wands to open chests and turn on lights and do other activities to help them on their quest.  It was really neat and would be something we would do when we go again.  It was a great little get away and highly recommend it to anyone who can go.  We are obviously having lots of fun hear in Ontario, there is so much to do we hope we can fit it all in in our time hear.  Take care all.

Christmas 2012

Christmas is Toronto has been great. Different, but great.  You can't beat the weather here. Compared to Edmonton Alberta weather, Toronto rocks.  Temperatures have not dipped below -10 and even at that we still hovered around the 0 degrees mark.  Snow didn't seem to be in the cards for Christmas at all but we did get a big dump on Boxing Day which made it feel like home. We were able to get together with quite a few different people over the holidays that we have gotten to know since arriving here.  We held two get togethers at our house. One on Christmas eve with the Tay family and one on New Years eve with the Wooley family, the Gundaker family, Nicole and her some Kingley, and Josi and her son Jacob.  We had a lot of fun playing on the Wii and playing in the snow on New Years Eve.    One of the highlights of the holiday was going out to visit my cousin Todd and his wife Paula their family in Cambridge for boxing day.  They just moved in a beautiful and large  house on a lake and they invited us to come have Christmas dinner with them and Paula's family.  We had a great time and were taken care of by great people.  The visit really helped to lesson my sadness over missing my family back in Alberta and our fun holiday get togethers.  Most of the holiday was spent in our pajamas and the kids felt fairly spoiled over their Christmas gifts so I say that it was a success.  By the end of week two with the lack of sleep and structure, needless to say I did blow my top a couple of times.  I'm glad my husband and kids are so forgiving cause I felt pretty guilty.  Although we enjoyed our holiday, I am glad we are back to real life again. Happy New Year.